Being a Yes mum…

I love arts, I love crafting but I don’t really love doing it with a toddler.

I realise that messy play is so vital and amazing for a childs development and such a fantastic way to allow them to express themselves but once that first paint pot is tipped over and crayon is all over the wooden dining table my heart sinks a little, its not that fun for me anymore and I can feel my stress levels rising!

I am having an internal battle, I really don’t want to be a mum that’s shadowing their child, cloth in hand, wiping up the crumbs, mud and marks but I also cant shake off my ‘I like things neat and organsied personality’ so I am trying to adapt and meet in the middle.

Paint is for nursery or toddler groups but crayons and colouring pencils (under supervision) can be for home. Playdough is cool but one colour at a time, I mean why would you mix up the colours??!

Water play fine but lets cover the area in towels first. Glitter ohhh haven’t got to that yet but I feel a firm NO not at home coming on!

Baking, tricky as if you read my blog you know I love to bake and you’ll know that its my therapy so that’s something I need to find middle ground on, perhaps we’ll start with crispy cakes and not expect a 3 tier Vicky sponge just yet but for now baby steps as that’s my thing!

Something that I am not a party pooper about is outdoor play. Mud and puddles are no problem, I love being outside, fresh air really is needed for us all plus Sonny can be entertained for ages with a toy digger, dumper and pile of stones, clothes can be washed and hands will be clean after.    Recently we went to one of our favourite parks to be greeted with a massive puddle, what did my 2 year old do??…jump in it of course! Cue the looks of 2 families wearing what looked like their best clothes giving me horrified glances! The wellies were on and spare clothes in the car so what’s the point in spending an hour trying to run and pull Sonny away from the puddle, getting myself into a stressed sweaty mess when Ian and I could stand back and see how happy walking through a puddle over and over again made him?!

Saying Yes carry on, have fun and not worrying about the mess and clean up operation after felt really good. My challenge is to be more of a ‘Yes’ mum, I will practice more and more on the crafty side so you never know there maybe hope for some glitter yet?

Love Harriet x

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Tag Team Parenting…

I never really paid much thought to how I would parent or the choices Ian and I would make once we had a family together but what we seemed to have developed is some sort of tag team?? I don’t even know if its a known term or if I’ve made it up but it very much sums up the parenting style that has found us and also I think saved me from going insane!

I couldn’t imagine parenting alone, I am not weak , challenge me to a challenge and I am the most competitive person with a strong mind however, gone are the days (thank god!) where the women is expected to bring up the children, run a household, hold a job together  whilst spinning on her head and applying a slick of lipstick at the same time.

I’m not ashamed to say I need my husbands help & support, I need him to equally take on the challenge of bringing up Sonny, after all he is both of our responsibility  plus I work hard too, I love my job so I need him to chip in and help run the household for the good of our family (and marriage).

Ian is so good at the above but wow I get told how hands on he his far too frequently, don’t get me wrong it is so great but no one has gone to him and said how lucky he is that I am hands on, that’s just a given that the mum is involved.

Through this parenting journey we’ve found that we both need time to have a breather, whether its time for exercise or meeting our mates, we tag team so that we can allow the other person that piece of space.  Sonny has 2 happy parents and a strong bond with both of us, he gets to see Mummy and Daddy working together whilst having an ‘hour or so off’ and coming back refreshed and revived ready for a happy family life.

I am so thankful we live in a time where dads are typically stepping up and the roles are more equal. I don’t know how the women generations before stayed sane..maybe they didn’t! Seriously though maybe its because they didn’t have to go back to work or other commitments outside of the home?

The only thing we personally need to consciously continue to do is keep allowing a day free for family time, time as a 3 ohhh and also time for date nights so we don’t do too much separately!

Love Harriet x

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My baby Sonny is turning 1 Today!….

I’m writing this post as my little baby boy Sonny is turning 1 today!!! Happy birthday gorgeous Sonny!!!  I think it’s a perfect day to press pause, just for a second and reflect on this first crazy year as a family and a first time mum

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