I never really paid much thought to how I would parent or the choices Ian and I would make once we had a family together but what we seemed to have developed is some sort of tag team?? I don’t even know if its a known term or if I’ve made it up but it very much sums up the parenting style that has found us and also I think saved me from going insane!
I couldn’t imagine parenting alone, I am not weak , challenge me to a challenge and I am the most competitive person with a strong mind however, gone are the days (thank god!) where the women is expected to bring up the children, run a household, hold a job together whilst spinning on her head and applying a slick of lipstick at the same time.
I’m not ashamed to say I need my husbands help & support, I need him to equally take on the challenge of bringing up Sonny, after all he is both of our responsibility plus I work hard too, I love my job so I need him to chip in and help run the household for the good of our family (and marriage).
Ian is so good at the above but wow I get told how hands on he his far too frequently, don’t get me wrong it is so great but no one has gone to him and said how lucky he is that I am hands on, that’s just a given that the mum is involved.
Through this parenting journey we’ve found that we both need time to have a breather, whether its time for exercise or meeting our mates, we tag team so that we can allow the other person that piece of space. Sonny has 2 happy parents and a strong bond with both of us, he gets to see Mummy and Daddy working together whilst having an ‘hour or so off’ and coming back refreshed and revived ready for a happy family life.
I am so thankful we live in a time where dads are typically stepping up and the roles are more equal. I don’t know how the women generations before stayed sane..maybe they didn’t! Seriously though maybe its because they didn’t have to go back to work or other commitments outside of the home?
The only thing we personally need to consciously continue to do is keep allowing a day free for family time, time as a 3 ohhh and also time for date nights so we don’t do too much separately!
Love Harriet x